I am pretty much the worst cook in the world when it comes to sweet things. When I first decided to sign up to the Sweet Swap I thought that I’d be able to make biscuits. Actually, I had The Boy (our households “master baker”) all lined up to make Snickerdoodle Cookies. I know that's kind of cheating to get him to make my Sweet Swap treat but he really is a great baker! Of course, all of that cheating aside my main reason for signing up to the Sweet Swap was because it was a fundraiser for Child Fund Australia - a good cause I'd say.
Alas, biscuits were not allowed so I tried my hand at what I was told is a FAIL PROOF sweetie, Rocky Road. It wasn’t fail proof. My first attempt at melting the chocolate was a disaster and after a trip to the supermarket (and some tears) to buy new chocolate The Boy was put in charge of melting duties!
My Rocky Road (which I’m now calling Miss Piggy’s Meltdown) is a little bit different to traditional Rocky Road. It contains dark chocolate, crystallised ginger, toasted almonds, cranberries and tears (and maybe one of my fingernails, but let's not talk about that).
Miss Piggy's "Meltdown"
Ingredients
- 2 x bags of milk chocolate "things" for melting
- Tissues (for when you start crying at above burnt chocolate)
- Car (for unplanned trip to the supermarket)
- 2 more bags of dark chocolate "things" (for melting after you burn the first lot)
- 1 x packet of mini marshmallows (though in hindsight I think bigger ones would be better)
- 1 x packet of crystallised ginger
- 1 x packet of toasted almonds
- 1 x packet of craisins
Steps
- Install visiting cat in the MOST inconvenient place in the kitchen.
- Trip over aforementioned cat.
- Swear.
- Chop up crystallised ginger into smaller chunks.
- Mix chopped up crystallised ginger in a bowl with marshmallows, toasted almonds and craisins.
- Melt chocolate.
- Comment to the cat that "things" don't seem to be going according to the plan.
- Burn chocolate (or just basically render it totally inedible).
- Swear.
- Swear (again).
- Husband comes in to try and rectify the damage stating "I KNEW this would happen" (yes, so did I).
- Depart kitchen (trip over cat).
- Have an epic thrown-down tantrum in the hall way (yes, that REALLY happened).
- Cry.
- Consult twitter for what the heck has gone wrong with the chocolate (everything it seems).
- Force husband to come to Coles to buy MORE chocolate, dark this time cos why the heck not?
- Return home with emergency chocolate supplies.
- Have husband melt chocolate whilst being told to get out of the kitchen (but hovering close by with camera annoyingly in hand).
- Allowed back into the kitchen to supervise mixing of melted chocolate and dry ingredients.
- Place chocolate mix into a shallow pan and place in the fridge overnight.
- Remove chocolate from the pan (surely this should be easier than it was).
- Attempt to chop chocolate into quarters (three for them and one for me).
- Nearly severe finger.
- Swear.
- Husband comes in to do the cutting as he doesn't want to spend the day in the emergency room.
- Tell husband he rocks.
- Wrap the buggers up + post them out of your life FOREVER!
- Cat goes back to napping in the lounge room now that his annoyance factor is no longer required.
The end (do not try this at home)!
Oh, so do you want to know what I received from my fellow sweet swappers? So far I've received two sweet parcels (one has gone M.I.A somewhere along the way). My first treat was from Rachel at TLC and she made me Lavender "Twix". My second treat was "popping candy" Brownies from the lovely Flick at Flick your Food.
Thanks for my treats Flick + Rachel - very yummy!
Oh! I'm so sorry so much drama went into the package I received. It was devoured, and much appreciated!
ReplyDeleteIt makes for a good story though doesn't it Mary? I'm glad you liked the Rocky Road - we made another batch yesterday (well, Dave did -- I watched for the lounge room).
DeleteOh dear. No more sweeties for you m'lady. Ps. Snickerdoodles are delish!!
ReplyDeleteA more rustic version of the already rustic rocky road ;)
ReplyDeleteOh the cat! :P Loved the way you included him in your method (hehe), and sounds a lot like me in the kitchen when I'm cooking - my cat gets to hear all my frustration!
ReplyDeleteAh, you made my day with this post, Mel... I can just picture it all. And you've made me even more delighted that I decided not to participate (with apologies to the organisers).
ReplyDeletelooks don't matter, its all the love, sweat and tears you put in! im sure everyone loved the end product!
ReplyDeleteOh dear, it does sound like you had quite the misadventure in the kitchen. Your meltdown does sound delicious though! :)
ReplyDeleteLove the idea of including ginger in the rocky road! And such pretty packaging too.
ReplyDeleteI totally LOVE your packaging! And whats a fingernail (or some cat hair) between friends?
ReplyDeleteLol ahh Miss Piggy, you are too awesome. Love reading your posts.
ReplyDeleteThat rocky road looks beautiful and sounds utterly delicious. Great name for it too! haha
Don't be too hard on yourself, the rocky road looks scrumptious (love the name, 'Meltdown').
ReplyDeleteAnd the pressure, oh the pressure! of having a cat watching your every move.
Aww, so sorry to hear you went through such chaos. I have to say I really enjoyed reading this post though - I felt a rollercoaster of emotions. haha. Love the look of it in the end, and seems your recipients loved it too!
ReplyDeletesweet making can be so stressful, glad it eventually turned out though! I was far too chicken to participate...
ReplyDeleteCrystalised ginger and cranberry sound like lovely additions to the standard rocky road. The end result look unaffected by the misfortunes that you suffered. Chin up and keep at it. Practice make perfect, no? :)
ReplyDeleteYou've got my vote for the story prize! ;) Your final Meltdown result looks delicious! (Gorgeous cat, too).
ReplyDeleteBlah, I'm so sad... I was your third sweet swap and I had tracking on my parcels and it says that your parcel has been delivered so I don't know what to do?
ReplyDeleteShari from www.goodfoodweek.blogspot.com
Although I am sorry it was so difficult for you, I really can not tell you how much I laughed in reading this post. Seriously. Dave is a superstar! You are awesome for trying! And Yes!! Snickerdoodles all the way next time!
ReplyDeletedespite what you went through, you sweets still look delicious! i would gladly eat the whole lot :D
ReplyDeleteI loved reading your step by step instructions for Miss Piggy's Meltdown- I was sitting here laughing!
ReplyDeleteNo. 29 have a stiff drink. ha ha you did well despite all the heartache, your rocky road looks delish and I'd happily scoff the lot.
ReplyDeleteI would of been thrilled to receive some of your miss piggys' meltdown! Fingernail and all (did I say that?) ;p
ReplyDeleteThis has to be the best recipe read every, so happy you took part.
Its hard to believe you had a tough time with this rocky road. At the end it looks so beautiful and I love your wrapping paper too!
ReplyDeleteI've messed up rocky road before so I empathise but your meltdown looks delicious - makes me wish I had more meltdowns if that is how you define it :-)
ReplyDeleteyour so funny mel,
ReplyDeleteyou made chocolate look like poo!
i'm sure your final rockyroad was delicious :)
haha love the recipe! thanks for the laugh :)
ReplyDeleteexcellent packaging, and i love to try it
ReplyDeleteWell, it sure was a rollercoaster ride... but the end result looks so tasty!! I'm impressed you stuck it out and didn't email us to tell us you quit! The steps of the recipe are particularly entertaining.
ReplyDelete